Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
