Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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