Texts From Last Night

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  (406): View more from Montana

  Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.

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  (406): Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it. http://tfl.nu/qcms
  Replies (2) Good night (1398) Bad night (808)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight

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  (713): Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight http://tfl.nu/37pc
  Replies (22) Good night (817) Bad night (2455)
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  (818): View more from California

  My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.

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  (818): My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert. http://tfl.nu/ehir
  Replies (38) Good night (1672) Bad night (3707)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.

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  (205): I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology. http://tfl.nu/8ghc
  Replies (18) Good night (1259) Bad night (4113)
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.

  (515): View more from Iowa

  That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.

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  (641): I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women. (515): That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage. http://tfl.nu/mozw
  Replies (5) Good night (2437) Bad night (1081)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels

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  (204): God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels http://tfl.nu/dxhw
  Replies (12) Good night (1133) Bad night (622)
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  (914): View more from New York

  he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.

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  (914): he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting. http://tfl.nu/z57t
  Replies (8) Good night (516) Bad night (1762)
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  (925): View more from California

  I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.

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  (925): I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you. http://tfl.nu/spyc
  Replies (3) Good night (951) Bad night (418)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.

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  (517): I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard. http://tfl.nu/4gv4
  Replies (1) Good night (1139) Bad night (403)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?

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  (713): I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla? http://tfl.nu/e5jq
  Replies (8) Good night (1359) Bad night (356)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.

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  (954): All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me. http://tfl.nu/3tzi
  Replies (1) Good night (581) Bad night (353)
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.

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  (906): I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7. http://tfl.nu/m2ux
  Replies (1) Good night (547) Bad night (297)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex

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  (207): He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex http://tfl.nu/e8rm
  Replies (0) Good night (555) Bad night (383)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.

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  (+61): We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors. http://tfl.nu/213b
  Replies (2) Good night (466) Bad night (310)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.

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  (616): I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony. http://tfl.nu/gfaq
  Replies (1) Good night (422) Bad night (404)

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