Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.