He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love