I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
