I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
