This is not my ceiling
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Randomize
