last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
