I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize