it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize