plz talk dirty to me
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
