Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
