I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
