so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
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