beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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