If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Randomize