I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
