I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
