Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
