I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Randomize