so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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