well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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