I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Randomize
