Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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