How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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