READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
