kristin has been a bad kristin
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Randomize
