How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
