he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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