It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Randomize
