The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
