Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Randomize
