So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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