If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I would ride that face into the sunset
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
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