i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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