I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
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