I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
