She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
