This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
