After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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