I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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