Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize
