Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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