end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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