You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
