dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize