did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
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