I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
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