Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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