Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
