Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
You had me at "let me see your balls"
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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