He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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